


loving the rain

by SnorkleShit



Category: The Librarians (TV 2014)
Genre: Angst, Damaged!Ezekiel, Getting Together, Jake is jake, Jazekiel was together in the Happily Ever Afters, M/M, Misunderstands, Mutual Pining, Peru, Pre-LIT-Breakup, Smut, What Happened In Peru Stays In Peru, but not really, canon AU, ezekiel's never been in a relationship, jazekiel - Freeform, unrequited feelings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-18
Updated: 2017-01-18
Packaged: 2018-09-18 07:34:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9374627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SnorkleShit/pseuds/SnorkleShit
Summary: "It just happens to people."In which Ezekiel and Jake navigate a series of misunderstandings that all began when the tension between them finally broke, one fateful night in Peru.But sometimes it takes a lot of beginnings to reach a happy ending.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [JJMurilega](https://archiveofourown.org/users/JJMurilega/gifts).



> A late secret Santa gift for my dear friend Riri!

“I can't take it anymore! I’m getting another room, talk to me in the morning when you’ve pulled your heads out of your you-know-what's!” Cassandra practically shouted. Her red hair whirled in her wake like a solar flare as she spun and stormed out of the motel room, slamming the door behind her. Ezekiel flinched involuntarily, but only a little bit. 

He and Jake had been in the midst of one of their biggest arguments yet, and he suddenly felt guilty for forgetting about Cassandra. Jake clenched his fists, and Ezekiel knew in the back of his mind he was also feeling a stab of remorse. Of course he felt bad about hurting _Cassandra’s_ feelings. He didn’t give a flying fuck about Ezekiel, that was obvious by the heat in his gaze and the passion in his shouts.

Except it _wasn’t_ obvious. Ezekiel had been going nuts over mixed signals from the guy since the day they met. He just didn’t make any sense. He was constantly looking at Ezekiel like he was deciphering the code to his soul. He got so angry over the most ridiculous things and he was constantly trying to boss Ezekiel around and he was such a _hypocrite_ and dear _god_ Ezekiel wanted to kiss him. He must be losing his mind.

“Now look what you’ve done,” Jake said, gesturing to the door. Ezekiel started.

“What _I’ve_ done?” Ezekiel demanded, even more offended than he had been a few months ago. This guy really knew how to push his buttons. “You’re the one that’s acting like you’re in charge! You don’t have any authority, you’re just an asshole! You think you can make up for your bullshit life by telling me us what to do?”

Jake took a few steps closer to him, fuming. Ezekiel stood his ground, and began to wonder if Jake was going to finally snap and beat the shit out of him. Jake had so much anger in his eyes and so much emotion coursing through his body, and he sure loved to brawl. What else was Ezekiel supposed to expect?

“You’re supposed to be part of a team now, Ezekiel! You can’t keep running off and jeopardizing everything! Do you understand what we’re dealing with here? This isn’t a fucking game! We could die! One of your stunts is going to get one of us killed one day!” Jake shouted, throwing his hands in the air. Ezekiel successfully managed not to flinch. He rolled his eyes, shaking his head.

“You are _seriously_ over reacting. You’re such a fucking asshole, you know that? It was fine,” Ezekiel dismissed, head starting to throb. 

“No, it’s not fine! At least I know what I’m doing! All you seem to be able to do is run around half-cocked, fucking everything up because you never know what you’re doing!” Jake exclaimed. 

Anger and hurt coursed through Ezekiel, burning through his gut. An ache gripped his body deeply, almost to the bone. Heat rippled between them, tension strung tight between their heaving chests. For a moment, everything was drowned out by the hammering of his heart. 

 

“You’re right,” Ezekiel breathed, his eyes flicking down and then up again, suddenly darkening. “I never know what I’m doing.”

And with that, he threw any semblance of caution and sanity to the wind. He surged forward and fisted his hands in Jake’s shirt, pulling him down into what was more of a crash than a kiss. 

_Please let me be lucky, please let me be lucky, please let me be lucky…_ he prayed, in the millennia of a millisecond that it took Jake to respond. Suddenly, Jake’s initial shock melted back into that same heat, that same passion. But this time, instead of yelling, Jake bit his way into Ezekiel’s mouth, his arms aggressively wrapping around Ezekiel’s torso and yanking him closer. 

Ezekiel took that as an invitation to get down to business, and reached to palm Jake through his jeans. Jake’s mouth broke away from his with a slight gasp, his eyes blown out with lust. 

“Why are you doing this?” Jake asked lowly. 

“I don't know why. I just know I want to,” Ezekiel replied, their faces just an inch apart. He squeezed Jake again, feeling him hardening through the rough fabric. “Are you gonna try and tell me you haven't thought about throwing me down on that bed and making me shut up?” 

Jake bit his lip, eyes flicking over Ezekiel in confliction.

“I didn't know you liked it rough,” he said, with a slight air of surprise. 

“What other way would it be?” Ezekiel scoffed. People didn't make love to Ezekiel Jones. They fucked him and then they moved on. And that was just fine with him. 

He dropped to his knees fluidly, before Jake could respond, hands making quick work of Jake’s belt and pants. He pulled Jake’s erection free and had his mouth on it before Jake could even register the sound of the zipper. Jake groaned, trembling slightly before his body went rigid. God, Ezekiel’s mouth was so warm and soft and tight. It had been a while since someone had done this to him. 

Ezekiel bobbed his head, using his hand to make up the difference, his tongue doing all these little twists and curls that made Jake see white behind his eyelids. Then Ezekiel got ambitious, and took more of Jake into his mouth, relishing the girth and the sounds Jake was making. This was _way_ funner than being yelled at. 

Pleasure surged through Jake, making his heart skip over itself. His hands reached to grip onto Ezekiel’s dark hair before he could think about it. It was surprisingly soft. Ezekiel moaned at the tug on his scalp, spine shuddering. His eyes flicked up to meet Jake’s, and fuck if that wasn’t one of the hottest things Jake had ever seen. 

“You like that?” Jake asked, his voice rough. Ezekiel responded by sinking his mouth lower onto Jake’s cock, taking him down his throat without gagging. Jake groaned at the sensation, hand tightening and tugging at Ezekiel’s hair, causing him to moan. The vibrations and muscles moving around his shaft caused him to bite his lip. He pulled back a bit, on Ezekiel’s hair, while pulling away himself. Ezekiel pulled away, getting the message. He gasped for breath for a moment, his hair all messed up, looking so vulnerable down on his knees with spit slicked lips. 

“Didn’t want to ruin the main event? I’m just that good?” Ezekiel asked, grinning coyly once he’d regained his breath. 

Jake flicked his eyes over the other man as he tried to recover from the overwhelming pleasure for a moment. 

“The main event? And what exactly would that be?” Jake wasn't sure how he felt about where this was going. God, he wanted Ezekiel, he always had. But Ezekiel didn't want him, that didn't make any sense. Ezekiel just wanted release. Ezekiel always wanted release, thrill. Did Jake really want to be a part of that? 

For once, Ezekiel looked remarkably vulnerable. Yet still eager. 

“Anything you want,” he said. Jake’s eyes widened.

“Anything?” He asked. Ezekiel nodded seriously, looking like he was submitting completely, down on his knees and everything. 

“ _Anything._ ” Ezekiel echoed once more. 

Jake heaved in a breath, one second of hesitation outweighed by a surge of desire. He moved forward, pulling Ezekiel to his feet, and then shoving him roughly towards the bed. Ezekiel just let himself be manhandled, a wide grin splitting across his features. 

Ezekiel crawled on his back to get more on top of the bed, getting into the right position just in time for Jake to descend upon him. Jake ripping off his own shirt and then doomed Ezekiel’s to the same fate. The buttons in Ezekiel’s blue dress shirt tore and flew, and Jake didn't give a damn. Ezekiel felt like the breath had been knocked out of him, he was so aroused. 

In seconds, Jake was kneeling on the bed over Ezekiel, staring down at him with a hunger in his eyes that would make concrete shudder. 

“What are you waiting for?” Ezekiel asked, after a moment of just that tense stare. “Are you sure you’re up to it? It’s normal for men your age-” 

 

Jake cut him off with a hand around his throat and a mouth to his collarbone, biting just enough around the bone to make Ezekiel’s eyes roll back. Ezekiel must have moaned, because Jake took it as a sign to press down just a bit harder around Ezekiel’s throat. _Perfect_.

Jake glanced up, to make sure it was okay, and found Ezekiel with the most pleased grin possible on his face. Typical. Another moment of that, and Jake pulled his hand away. Ezekiel gasped for breath, letting out a groan of pleasure almost immediately, as Jake had given him almost no reprieve. Now the older man’s mouth was on his throat, biting and sucking harshly over where his fingers had just pressed down so wonderfully. 

In all the attention to his neck, Ezekiel didn’t notice Jake’s hands moving south until his hard cock was being freed from his jeans. Ezekiel made an embarrassingly choked noise, his arms reaching to wrap around Jake on top of him as he bucked up. 

“Please,” Ezekiel heard himself breath roughly. More of a grunt, really. But it brought Jake to a full on stop, which threatened to drive Ezekiel _mad_. Jake’s head turned and lifted to lock onto Ezekiel’s tilted back face, and Ezekiel did his best to concentrate. 

“What was that?” Jake asked lowly, his accent thicker than ever. It was kinda hot. Ezekiel laughed, shaking his head.

“You want me to beg? Saw that coming. Talk about predictable,” Ezekiel told Jake, shaking his head in mock disappointment. Jake smirked, diving in to kiss Ezekiel on the mouth finally, ending any trail of sarcastic thought he might have had. It wasn’t rough, per se, but it was still intense. Gentle but full of a sudden emotion that Ezekiel hadn’t expected. His whole body melted into it, and then Jake’s hand was raking through his hair and making him shudder with pleasure. 

But in the back of his mind, Ezekiel’s panic alarms began to blare. This was something different, now. This wasn’t just release. There was emotion pouring from Jake’s lips, from the way he was suddenly touching Ezekiel like he _mattered_ \- Ezekiel had never been with anyone with emotions involved. Ever. 

His nervousness was soon halted by Jake’s mouth moving lower, and lower, and lower...if Ezekiel was to be honest, he hadn’t expected Jake to really pay any particular attention to him. Ezekiel had intended for an angry, rough romp in the hay, per se. This was far beyond that, and he had no idea how to feel.

Jake’s mouth was mindblowing. Beyond mindblowing. Ezekiel was pretty sure he was cursing up a storm, but it could have been in his head. How the hell had a country boy from Oklahoma learned to suck cock like a pro? Ezekiel supposed his love of art history wasn’t the only thing lifestyle he’d been hiding. 

Just as he as reaching his edge, his hands buried in Jake’s hair, the cowboy pulled away and stepped back. Ezekiel took a few breaths, sinking into the mattress. Then he raised his head to watch Jake get rid of both of their pants. 

Ezekiel pulled his legs up and apart once he was completely nude, smiling at Jake invitingly as he did. A smile that was more like a dare, really. Maybe now the strangeness would pass and they could get back to business.

“There’s lube in my bag, front pocket.” Ezekiel said, jerking his head towards the closet. Jake blinked at him, his heat momentarily sidelined by his disbelief.

“You bring lube with you on our missions?” Jake asked incredulously. Ezekiel felt his face flush, but he only grinned at Jake wider.

“Well, I did once I started to think about you.” He admitted. Why had he admitted that? 

“Think about me how?” Jake asked, as he turned towards the closet. Ezekiel admired his back muscles and his ass while he bent over to retrieve the substance from Ezekiel’s satchel. This was going to be _fun_.

“Oh, just thinking about you fucking me into a mattress till I can’t remember my name. You know, the usual,” Ezekiel said, in a mockingly casual tone. Jake returned to the bed with the bottle, slathering some on his fingers. He looked over Ezekiel with an emotion Ezekiel couldn’t quite name, before moving up onto the bed and in between his legs. Ezekiel expected it to start right then, expected another hand around his neck while Jake got him ready just a little on the rushed side, Ezekiel expected it to burn in all the right ways. 

“You gonna shut me up now or what?” Ezekiel asked lowly, once Jake was on top of him again, their faces inches apart. Jake grinned, a gleam in his eyes that excited Ezekiel to no end. 

“Yes,” Jake said, one of his lubed fingers starting to circle Ezekiel’s hole. “But I’m going to do it my way. But don’t worry, we’ll have time for your way in moment.” 

“What-” Ezekiel started to ask, but was cut off by Jake’s mouth on his neck and his finger starting to press in. Jake didn’t bite this time, or even suck particularly hard. No, he was kissing and licking at the places he had bitten, causing all the tension in Ezekiel’s frame to slowly melt away. Once Jake’s first finger was in, he rocked it in and out slowly, stroking against Ezekiel, as opposed to pounding him open. It was a foreign sensation to him, but God did it feel good. 

Then Jake’s second hand began to run over Ezekiel’s torso, rubbing gently and warmly over his skin and making him shudder. Another finger joined Jake’s index inside of Ezekiel, slowly spreading him out without even a lick of a burning sensation. Well, Jake had been right about one thing. While this hadn’t been at all what Ezekiel had been expecting, it had sure successfully shut him up. Despite his confusion, he could only hum and moan happily, his head turned fully to the side to allow Jake full access to his throat. 

As Jake added a third finger, he began to crook his fingers into a more aggressive angle, pressing deeper with his strokes. Ezekiel tensed a bit, letting out a groan as he tried to press himself down harder onto Jake’s fingers. To be honest, he wasn’t used to three fingers, because he was used to whoever he was with just going for it after two. Why was Jake taking this much time? His confusion and slight panic managed to manifest finally, into words. 

“Just fuck me already,” he managed to croak out. Jake turned to press his lips against Ezekiel’s ear. 

“Like I said, my way first,” he whispered. Before Ezekiel could think of a reply, Jake was shifting to press his lips against Ezekiel’s. Again, the kiss was soft and full of emotion. It took Ezekiel to pieces faster than any drug or fast hard fuck. It was a whole new kind of exhilarating terror that built in him, every time that Jake touched him like this. 

The confusion and fear must have finally shown through in some way this time, because Jake pulled away, looking down at him and furrowing his eyebrows in concern. He reached to cup Ezekiel’s face, and Ezekiel tensed underneath him further. 

“What’s wrong?” Jake asked. Ezekiel stared up at him, frozen, licking his lips as he tried to think himself out of this situation. But his head was all over the place, he could barely think straight. It was like Jake had thrown his brain into a blender the second grabbing turned into caressing. 

“I’m just not used to...this…” Ezekiel tried to explain, unsure himself of what his words were even supposed to mean. Luckily, the man on top of him was a genius. Jake stared at him quizzically for a few more seconds, before his eyes widened in discovery of a pattern.

 _I didn’t know you liked it rough._  
_What other way would it be?_

“Oh my god, you weren’t kidding, were you?” Jake realized. 

“What?” Ezekiel asked. Jake blinked, swallowing past the sudden tightness in his throat. 

“You’ve never had anyone be gentle and, like, loving and stuff, with you, have you?” Jake asked. Ezekiel tilted his head up at Jake, looking at him as if he was an idiot.

“Well, yeah. That behavior is usually reserved for people you care about. That’s kind of unheard of, in my sexual history.” Ezekiel stated bluntly, as if it meant nothing. But it meant a fucking _lot_ to Jake.

“First time for everything,” Jake said, swallowing as he ran his hands over Ezekiel’s neck and torso before he leaned down and took Ezekiel’s nipple into his mouth. Ezekiel expected him to bite it, but just laved his tongue over it, causing Ezekiel to squirm a bit under him at the pleasure from an unexpected place. Ezekiel regained his senses after a moment of pleasure, pushing at Jake’s shoulders a bit to get him to sit back up.

“Wait, what? What are you talking about?” Ezekiel asked, panic starting to bubble over. Jake gave him a long look that he didn’t understand, as he slowly pressed their foreheads together. As unfamiliar as the contact was, Ezekiel didn’t stop him. Not even when Jake’s arms came to wrap around him slowly, hands running over his skin and leaving behind trails of light. 

“I know I promised I’d fuck you into the mattress, but right now I’d much rather make love to you. Nice and slow.” Jake told him, voice nothing but heavy and near desperate sincerity. Ezekiel squinted at him, trying to pick up any sign of a joke. Make _love?_ That was a whole other ball park that Ezekiel had never imagined he’d be allowed to play in. 

“Why?” He breathed in response. Jake ground down against him, bringing both of their erections back to full attention. Ezekiel threw his head back, taken by surprise. Jake leaned down and pressed a kiss to the pulse of his neck, under where his ear met his jaw. If was the softest press of chapped lips, but it made Ezekiel’s head spin. Then Jake was whispering in his ear again, and what he said resonated down to somewhere dark and hidden in Ezekiel’s soul.

“Because I care about you.” He said. Then he paused to press a few more kisses to Ezekiel’s jaw, giving the other man time to process what he had said. 

“You said I could have anything I wanted,” Jake continued, ”And right now I want to show you what this feels like.” 

Ezekiel felt like the wind had been knocked out of him. Jake wanted to make _love_ to him, he _cared_ about him, could this mean what he thought it meant? Ezekiel would never admit it, but he had been doing his best to ignore his rather persistent feelings for Jake. He had shoved them down, filed them away, contented himself with getting the only thing he could get : a quick, angry fuck. 

Leave it to Jake of all people to throw a wrench in his well planned out routine. He didn’t want to give into this, it was dangerous, it was terrifying. It was the unknown. But that thrill, that fear of the unknown, it also beckoned him. The throbbing of his heart overruled his cynical mind, and he surged up to kiss Jake, attempting to pour some of those more intimate feelings into the kiss for the first time that night. If Jake sensed the change, he didn’t comment on it. 

_I must be out of my mind,_ Ezekiel screamed at himself as Jake’s hands ran over his body. 

“Don’t worry, i’ll fuck you till you can’t walk next time.” Jake said, when they broke apart again. 

_Next time?_

Ezekiel didn't bother to ask, he was too scared whatever it was that he had stumbled would slip away if he did. 

Jake took his own erection into his hand, pumping it slowly. He was also afraid if he went _too_ slow, Ezekiel would come to his senses and bail on Jake. He knew Ezekiel would never want him the way Jake wanted Ezekiel. The minute the fun was over Ezekiel would probably climb out the window. 

That was just the way the thief was, that was especially obvious now. But maybe, if Jake couldn't have his love, he could manage to captivate his lust and his curiosity for a little while. And in that, he could have once in a lifetime opportunities like this. A chance to give something to Ezekiel, something he would never be able to steal for himself. 

Jake leaned back, reaching to run his hands underneath Ezekiel’s thighs, lifting his legs up and spreading them apart. Ezekiel went with it, easily letting Jake spread him apart and fold him in half. Jake bit his lip, rubbing his hands over Ezekiel’s thighs as he pressed his head against his entrance. Ezekiel tensed, and Jake watched his throat swallow nervously. 

“Relax.” Jake whispered soothingly, reaching to stroke Ezekiel’s hardness. Ezekiel shuddered, melting a little into the bed. Jake took the chance, gasping as he slowly began to push in. Ezekiel moaned, twisting the sheets up in his hand as he tried to focus on relaxing around Jake. He went so slowly, it didn’t hurt, but it was impossible not to focus on the slow slide of being filled up so gently. It was nearly overwhelming. He was used to being plowed, not stroked, per se. 

Ezekiel reached up to grab onto Jake’s arms, near desperately, as if he were a little scared of how good it felt. Jake pressed forward, so that Ezekiel would wrap his arms around him, and so that he could press his forehead against Ezekiel’s. 

“You feel so good. Amazing. Fuck.” He whispered, with a sincerity that made Ezekiel stare up at him as if he was insane. Ezekiel said nothing in response - he couldn't. As Jake started to move slowly in and out of him, all he could do was close his eyes and try not to tremble too hard. He bit his lip, and Jake started to stroke his cock again, staring intently down at his expression.

“I wanna hear you.” Jake whispered, angling his strokes upwards a little more. Ezekiel groaned louder, arching his back and trying to ride Jake back. They rocked together, heat and pleasure and confusing emotions rippling between them. Ezekiel had forgotten where he was or what had lead here, all that mattered was the feeling of Jake inside and all around him. 

Jake pressed a kiss to Ezekiel’s lips, running his hands lovingly all over Ezekiel with a fever as he started to pick up his pace a little bit. Ezekiel moaned as he began to relax into a more familiar pace, but still tingling all over from the intimate teasing before. Now he could focus his mind on just squeezing down on Jake, relishing in that feeling of being filled up. 

Jake bottomed out, gasping hotly against Ezekiel’s ear as they took a moment to just breathe. 

Jake occupied this time by kissing Ezekiel softly on the jaw and muttering sweet nothings (in literal French, which Ezekiel didn't understand) while stroking his cock slowly. Ezekiel took a deep breath, eyes fluttering closed. 

He couldn't believe Jake was doing this. Going to such lengths to prove something to him, he seemed so intent on doing this to Ezekiel, treating him like he...like he had feelings for him. And implying they'd be doing this _again?_

“I want to ride you.” Ezekiel whispered. Jake pulled up to stare down at him. What he was thinking, Ezekiel didn't know. But a smile spread across his face bigger than the Earth’s curve. After a moment, Jake nodded dumbly, and then they were rolling, Jake wrapping his arms around Ezekiel and pulling him along while he rolled onto his back. Ezekiel groaned as they got settled, sinking down onto Jake’s shaft with more gravity than before. 

He stayed like that's, toes curled, eyes clenched closed, Jake’s hands on his hips grounding him to reality. He pressed his hands against Jake’s broad chest, slowly opening his eyes and looking down at the other man. 

“Why are you doing this?” Ezekiel whispered, voice exposed and bare. The bliss on Jake’s expression faltered into worry. He looked over Ezekiel, remorse for someone else’s actions in his eyes. But _whose_ action? Ezekiel’s?

_Or is he wondering who hurt me? Who made me like this? Everyone always.._

His train of thought was cut off by Jake reaching to stroke his cock again, causing him to hiss. 

“I’m doing this because I want to.” Jake answered. “I want to make you feel good, to show you what this is like when someone cares about you. I want you.” 

Ezekiel stared at him like he was raving mad, but he leaned back and he started to ride him with the grace of someone in love. Jake didn't know what to say as the feeling enveloped his body, him and Ezekiel rocking together, openly moaning, perfectly in sync. He honestly hadn't expected Ezekiel to return this much attention, this much passion. He...didn't know what to think of it. It would have to wait for later, because now was not the time for thinking anyway.

Ezekiel cried out as Jake rubbed at just the right angle inside of him, faltering in his movements as pleasure rippled between them. Jake groaned, reaching to pull Ezekiel down towards him, wrapping his arms around the other man and kissing him messily as he thrust up into his tight heat. A few more thrusts between their bodies, and Ezekiel was crying out on top of him, stiffening up before slumping forward. Jake followed right after him, relishing the sounds of Ezekiel’s climax as he grunted his own. They stayed like that for a moment, just breathing, tangled up in each other, as they came down.

Exhausted, Ezekiel rolled off of him and flopped onto the bed. He looked flushed, and a little dazed, as if he wasn’t sure whether he was dreaming or not. They glanced at each other, and held gazes for a moment. But then something in Ezekiel’s expression changed, and he looked away. The rawness between them allowed Jake to feel the shift as if it was an earthquake. But the shift in what? He had...no idea what this had been. Neither of them said anything, and Jake bowed his head, suddenly feeling like he had messed something up. 

Silence ruled as Ezekiel slowly dragged himself out of the bed, heading off to the bathroom. Jake watched him go, running a hand over his face as he tried to catch his breath. What had just happened? 

Elation and pleasure, all that passion...it morphed into uncertainty and doubt. How could Jake have been so stupid? Ezekiel could never have real feeling for him! Ezekiel would probably never feel how Jake felt. And now, because of how _weak_ he was, Ezekiel might figure it out. It was obvious Ezekiel had indeed just been looking for a distraction, for release. And Jake had done what he usually did, messed everything up. Why did he always do this? 

Reality set in, swirling around Jake’s head like a raincloud of possible outcomes. Ezekiel was probably going to come back out here and have a good laugh at how much of an _idiot_ the alleged genius was. 

Jake swallowed the bile in his throat and clenched down the pain in his heart. He glanced towards the bathroom door, and the light seeping through the crack. Or rather, the dark interruptions in the light that signaled Ezekiel’s presence. Oh well, he’d done worse in his day. Jones had got what he wanted - release, a distraction. Now Jake had to get out before Ezekiel had time to think over it and figure anything _real_ out. 

\-------------

Ezekiel took a few moments to just _breathe_ , bending over the sink and ignoring the mirror as if it could tell the future. Then he gathered himself, clenching his fists. He was a Librarian. He could face this. If Jake...if there was even a possibility Jake returned his feelings - 

_Run, hide, get away!_

Ezekiel turned towards the door, reaching for the handle. He was going to do the emotionally mature thing, this time. Maybe this could be something. Maybe this could be l-

The door swung open to reveal an empty room. Jake was nowhere to be seen, his clothes and bags gone. The door across the room wasn’t latched. Ezekiel felt his heart crush underneath it’s own weight, not for the first time. He swayed slightly, feeling like he’d been gutted. Jake had bailed. After everything that had just happened...the first person to touch him with love in his whole life and they had _bailed_ like he meant nothing. Just like he always did to everyone else. 

After a moment of devastated silence, Ezekiel began to chuckle. Not so much in amusement as exasperation. Ezekiel should have known he was only ever going to get what was coming to him. If his eyes were hot and moist, he pretended not to notice. 

And the next day, when Jake faced him in the light of the sun and told him and Cassandra that it would just be smarter to go their separate ways. Ezekiel had hesitated, but before he even knew it, Cassandra threw in the towel. That was it, the band broke up. And as Jake looked across the table at him like he was _nothing_ , Ezekiel had a horrible feeling he was Yoko. 

He swallowed any emotions the break up brought, standing, and turning his back on the other two without saying a word. Why should he say anything? Goodbyes meant nothing. He had thought maybe Cassandra...but even her, she didn’t really care about him. He had outlived his usefulness. Whatever, he was better on his own anyways. 

And if he went back to that motel room alone for one more night and waited for someone to come back, well, nobody came by to notice.


End file.
